Almost Love

let me just hurt tonight

i ran out of words for you

love isn't love

and true isn't true

i ran out of words for you

but the rain is coming

i smell it on the wind

whipping and screaming like a train

just let me cry tonight

what could i say

love like a waterfall washing away

but love isn't love

and true isn't true

i ran out of words for you

or maybe i do

believe in a kiss like sunrise breaking the day

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I Used To Be On Fire

he smiled

i loved him

i told him everything i had

but time started slipping

he stopped coming home

i stood alone in the cold

a swollen moon chased Orion

the two of them dancing forever that way

they've done this before

the lead and the follow

the heart and the hollow

i used to be on fire

i tore out the phone and died when he left

a long time of crying and beer

and strangers 

over and over were strangers staring at me

touching my hair

it's like they could see it

my broken light 

i used to be on fire

i locked the doors and cried myself raw when he left

i loved him

never pictured the end

then i saw his eyes 

her red hair mirrored there

he said he was leaving

the memory still stabs me

i used to be on fire

the heart and the hollow

such a perfect pair

It was a long time ago, but I feel it again. Beautiful love somehow changing.

So Tired Of This Unfinished Song 

I needed to spin in the softness

taste candy on your lips

i propped you up in butterscotch and fantasy

love me?

i don't even know you

just footprints in the snow

corner me

kiss me

push your hands through my hair

turn me and spin me 

the sun is still down

i trampled through midnight's fresh snow on the ground

spin me and kiss me

snow

shattered diamonds around

spin me and hold me

dusty prints stamp the ground

Asking The Sky

Daybreak stains the horizon -- she wipes tangerine streaks low on a waking sky. 

I am here again, where I have always been at my window throwing wishes at the dawn.

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I look at a half moon in the sky

tracing empty hearts against the night

the stars never answer

if you'll ever be mine

I only want a couple things

happy and satisfied

If I Was Not Drinking I would Be Crying

I got trouble

it eats away at me

how do i pay off my sorrows

and all the things that haunt me

i fell in love, you know how it goes

rainbows and daydreams

but oh, the troubles

love

reach into your guts for everything you've got

and use it like a bomb

do it again tomorrow, promise me

easy as stirring coffee

it's a never-ending wave

a dawn forever breaking

everything

if freedom ever comes it might be more than i can do

hold my hand

Just A Cold January Thought

tears on my cheeks

a dirty wine glass

can you tell me if i could be

something to you

the music ended

i had these empty dreams 

tell me 

what good could i be to you

i stay up at night

pour myself a glass

tell me

what am i to you

sinking sun and wintry cold

who am i to you

i feel like a stone

gotta take back my levity

gotta shine like a lighter soul

what if i never caught your eye

tell me

between me and you

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Again, i promised myself and my dormant writer's heart that I would throw a few words on the page. Didn't say I would bring them to life again, but I will get there.

I got this broken poem…

a wintry soul

nobody's fault

love grows cold

love grows cold

no one's fault but my own

where did it go?

your laughter was a sunrise

your touch was like a flood tide

gotta tell you that i'm angry 

gotta tell you that it hurts

can you let me go

just let me go

the winter sky is raining

let me go

just let me go

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They held hands under an umbrella on the sidewalk in the rain. A woman and her child moved up the library's steps Monday, and left me wondering.

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I have not been feeling it lately, but I will write things down. that's gotta do more than nothing at all…

A Midnight Thought

My roadkill heart

messy eyes

i love you

my soul's undressed

fingers like vines

your dagger smile

i love you

A long time ago in anger he told me, you don't have to like it.

I don't.

beautiful sunlight on vanilla snow is just an impression you know

i've got a bucket of stardust
i've got dreams to share
we can start so slow so slow
press against me
see where we go

timid smile
honey on my lips
take a sip
gentle gentle gently
fill gaps i can't see
quiet quiet quietly

shooting stars flew
five overhead and i remember you
under a sullen January moon
orange on the horizon and drifting over town
tossing shadows around me
quiet quiet quietly
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Life's a riot sometimes. Like when you're sitting in the car in the cold with breath misting quiet air. You just wanna throw your whole life out there in a rush, a stone in the well, but you don't.
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I would write more, but I am just not feeling it. The words are all so forgettable to me. The spark is missing. That little snap of life that warms you forever or burns you down.
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A new year started and I need to get my head back in it. Gotta dust off the sadness and pry my soul free.

For You

i love you, no matter what happens

and you’ve always been right

about our life 

the snow 

the sunrise

good things that fall apart

you say i’ve gotta grow up

bloodshot eyes 

i'm coming unglued

whatever happens, i love you

----------------

I got a debt i can't pay

he loves me so much

he's crying at me

just being myself

but not enough

i got this debt i can't pay

says i don't kiss him anymore

and doom at my door

got this debt that's so heavy

i think i'm afraid

dull eyes and tired face 

so am i, he tells me

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sometimes things gotta change

water to ice

clouds to rain

things don't always stay the same

i feel it coming

such a slow tide

sometimes things gotta change

smoke to fire

dusk to black

things we got don't always remain

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